Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Okay, sometimes there's a reason that instead of going to bed I decide to look at one blog, just one blog and then it's two blogs and then three...

But at least I discovered this beautiful post -- thank you, Joan.

3 comments:

Joan Kelly said...

Thank you for linking to me and for the kind words, you are such a good egg. I was thinking about you yesterday, as an aftermath to talking a little about you on Sunday with Jessica.

This is unrelated to your sweetness with my recent post you linked to... I just have been thinking about gender and trans issues, and how such issues get cast, and by whom, and what I end up doing with all these ideas about all of it. You popped into my head because of having recently read your intro/foreward/notsurewhatthetechnicalnameisforit piece in NOBODY PASSES, where you directly confronted the editor's intense desire/need for you to identify as one gender or the other, and you talked about, yeah, I get that they want me to pick one so to speak, and how hard that is for people (the I-want/need-to-know people), and not once did you say "I will or I won't choose, and here's why."

You just left it at this kind of compassionate head-nod about yeah, I get that this is what they're going through, and also like it (rightly) had zero to do with what you actually should or shouldn't do, and why, or any of that. I was talking to Jessica about how powerful that was, I mean I've never seen somebody essentially make a strong statement without having to announce and deconstruct for the audience that they are in fact making a strong statement.

Which is not to disparage those who announce and deconstruct, etc. It's just to say that it was so noticeable and so revelatory, for me as a reader. Frankly it's what made me feel like, holy shit why haven't I put my life on pause to sit and read this book straight through already?

So, I say again, I fucking love MBS.

mattilda bernstein sycamore said...

Oh, thank *you* for more beautiful words, beautiful words this time directed at me, yes me, so I especially love this part:

"I've never seen somebody essentially make a strong statement without having to announce and deconstruct for the audience that they are in fact making a strong statement"

Okay now I have to run so I can actually get to the important thing I have to get to before 5 p.m. why before 5 p.m., oh no before 5 p.m. oh no...

Love --
mattilda

Joan Kelly said...

Heck, it's the least I could do.

I still fail regularly, but your writing (your good heart in the world) helps me remember that I value the courage and clarity that allows for compassionate responses to disagreeable words or actions by others. Some days and some topics, I am still reactive. But some days I go, hey, I love it when that Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore is kind in new ways I haven't seen or thought of...maybe I could give it a go some time myself...