Friday, April 03, 2009

Nothing grows

Today’s slogan: I’m not depressed, I just don’t feel hopeful about anything! The hardest part is talking about how terrible I feel, and then feeling worse -- whatever happened to release? I wonder if I just keep becoming more and more exhausted until even exhaustion is too exhausting to contemplate. Although I guess it’s always more draining to think about feeling worse. Except when I feel worse, which seems quite often.

Today it’s so windy that whatever usually happens in the wind happens way more. What usually happens? That construction site -- the fence has fallen down, exposing a hill of brown dirt -- where do they make dirt like that, too light for earth really? It wouldn’t even be comforting to swim in it. Cats wouldn’t want to climb that hill, too dirty. Nothing grows. But still -- they’ll put a building on it, no not on it but over it, over the brown dirt too light for earth, really, and I’m watching.

2 comments:

thissouthernfaggot said...

Today’s slogan: I’m not depressed, I just don’t feel hopeful about anything!

I find my self thinking this quite a bit, especially recently. I never really know how to describe it, but I think this works pretty well.

mattilda bernstein sycamore said...

Yay for slogans -- and for feeling better, dammit!

Love --
mattilda