Monday, June 22, 2009


There’s something seductive about the repetition of something you weren’t trying to repeat -- like the word something, right? No, I’ll give you more information. I’m in the bathroom, putting on more Posumon -- I know it’s more, it’s just that I don’t know that it’s more, right after more. I mean I’ve already put more on, and I don’t realize it until I’m washing my hands, and I remember oh, I just washed my hands. And now my fingertips kind of hurt, dry skin from too much soap, water. Soap, water.

Should I put on more Posumon -- it does freshen my sinuses, no not my sinuses but the feeling around them -- my sinuses are cracking from the dancing, the dancing that made me kind of high for a few minutes, pushing through my head like a board, board head into that bright hello, runway, literally runway in my house music hallway but now it’s my head pushing through me. At the Nob Hill Theatre, when he says he likes the way I smell he doesn’t mean the Posumon he’s talking about my armpits. I know, because he says I like the way you smell right after his nose lifts from, yes, my armpits. I am a detective, but I’m not that kind of detective.

Everyone sweats. Everyone smells. But not everyone puts on medicated liniment 37 times in one day, one hour, one moment just waiting for the next menthol cinnamon eucalyptus cassia moment no wait that’s the toothpicks what’s in the liniment please more liniment, please more just don’t dry out my hands.


Hilary Goldberg said...

"There’s something seductive about the repetition of something you weren’t trying to repeat -- like the word something, right?"
Poetry where there was none.


mattilda bernstein sycamore said...

Yay for poetry where there was none!

Love --

Anonymous said...


I was kind of hoping you might be able to help me out. One of my friends recently got out of a really violent relationship with his ex-boyfriend, and he's been having trouble finding outlets from his pent up anger, hurt and frustration. He's over the main hurdle of accepting that he is not to blame, but I guess he feels that in order to move on he needs to find someone that he can relate to. Do you know of any books that deal with domestic violence within homosexual relationships? They seem to be few and far inbetween. You were the first person that I thought to ask, given your broad knowledge of obscure queer politics and issues.

Thank you.

mattilda bernstein sycamore said...

Well congratulations to your friend for getting out of the abusive relationship!!!!

As for books on that subject, let me think about it -- if I think of something, I'll post it here -- or maybe someone else has an idea...

Love --