Friday, June 18, 2010

Falling down

Speaking of allergies, here I am walking up the hill into an insanely cold wind -- maybe it’s the way my jaw gets tense, even with all this fresh air. Or maybe it’s what this air brings into my head, the season right here and far away, all of it. Maybe it can blow all of that away too, but when I get back down to my apartment, where the air isn’t nearly as fresh, trying to avoid the person in front of me who’s smoking, when I get back down I feel wiped out. At least I had a few hours early in the day, a few hours when I felt good. And then: the rest of the day.

But then: 20 minutes of some wired energy, just before the walk, I’m walking and I’m trying to keep this energy, even while I’m trying to let it go, so I can go to bed. I’m chewing on this toothpick, telling Randy how good this one is -- it really is like drugs, when you’re crashing and you’re trying to manage. But no -- I mean, this toothpick is amazing -- so much flavor, not all of them have this much flavor. I wish I had these toothpicks when I did drugs. What did I use instead?

Up at the top of the hill, with the cathedral and all these WASPy gardens -- petunias in a circle, with a fence -- really! Roses falling down -- roses don’t really like it here -- but there was something I was going to say about roses, what was it about roses? Falling down.

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