Sunday, January 09, 2011

Creativity and madness

So I’m looking through the unframed art I have by my grandmother, trying to figure out which pieces to frame. I have a box of these crayon drawings, layers and layers of color and gorgeous scratches, I ended up taking six of them to the framing place, or maybe it was seven. Probably I’ll end up bringing more than I can put on my walls, but at least that will keep the art safe.

Anyway, I remembered this one drawing on some kind of translucent paper, almost like tracing paper but thicker, and my grandmother outlined something that looks like a letter, at the top that says Creativity and Madness. But I didn’t remember what it says below -- Santa Fe! I look at the back of the piece -- oh, it’s a conference that took place in Santa Fe in maybe 1992 or something. When I saw the part about Santa Fe, Creativity and Madness, well then of course I had to frame that one, even if it’s not one of my favorites visually.

That I’m talking to my mother, and I mention this piece, and she says Creativity and Madness, that’s a conference I was thinking of going to, I have the program right here, but it doesn’t look that interesting. But then she ends up reading me the program anyway, to see if I’m interested in anything, but it’s a therapy conference with a $500 registration fee so of course I won’t be going, but I say I guess I could just walk in, and those kinds of things they don’t usually notice. But actually they probably would notice, since I don’t really look like a therapist -- I guess I could say I’m a survivor of two therapists.

My mother says no you aren’t. What do you mean I’m not? She says let’s not talk about that, and I realize she interrupted me right when I said survivor, which kind of surprises me actually -- I mean it’s not like she ever acknowledges the abuse really, but usually she avoids telling me it didn’t happen, but here it’s kind of funny because all I was saying was that I was a survivor of two therapists, and my mother does acknowledge that that was true, right? And right then she got defensive. I wonder what that means exactly.

6 comments:

Campbell B. said...

I can't imagine having your mother and father being therapists. Too many therapists in one family. I would feel so over-analyzed. :-)

mattilda bernstein sycamore said...

Yes, what a wonderful atmosphere it was, oh my!

Love --
mattilda

Wil Lake said...

Mattilda you never leave it boring like moi...success...and prosperity...
your fan/friend Wil

mattilda bernstein sycamore said...

Wil, thank you thank you thank you -- and, and prosperity and magnificence to you as well!

Love --
mattilda

davka said...

Cheers to your Madness and Creativity. Cheers to your survival.

mattilda bernstein sycamore said...

Yes, cheers and cheers and cheers and cheers -- and, to you, my dear!

Love --
mattilda