Tuesday, January 11, 2011


Here I am in some vague space of exhaustion and not-quite-loneliness. Maybe in San Francisco I would end up at the Nob Hill Theatre, and I’m not sure if that’s better or worse than turning on the pointless cruise sites, and then turning away, waiting to see. Much better than browsing, if someone wants something then they’ll write to me. Or, I mean, if they think they want something. Or, if they think they don’t want something, but they want me to think they want something. Or, well, I don’t know.

There is a porn shop here, but it’s way too far for me to walk to. I guess there’s a bus, but that means waiting alongside stripmall hell and endless car exhaust, and at night the bus rarely comes, so then I would be waiting there too, afterwards, so that’s never really going to happen. I don’t even think of going there. I mean, if someone said let’s go now, I’d jump in the car, but I don’t know if there’s anyone like that in Santa Fe. Someone honest enough to say let’s go to the porn shop. Or, there’s probably someone, but I definitely don’t know that person yet.


Cody Coquet said...

I would be that honest, but am sadly not in Sante Fe.

mattilda bernstein sycamore said...

Yay for honesty -- maybe when you visit :)

And thanks for saying hi!

Love --