Sunday, February 20, 2011


What’s today? Today is another day when I feel so exhausted I can barely function. Why does my neighbor spray so much toxic shit in her apartment -- air freshener or something, coming through the walls. I felt a little better when I woke up, working on the descriptive blurb for The End of San Francisco, but as soon as I ate I crashed. And, started to get so warm. Is it really that warm outside -- didn’t feel warm when I went out there, an amazing breeze and the air has changed, I can’t describe it exactly but it feels fresher, except when everyone’s fireplaces are on -- maybe this is spring air, I better go outside to get some.

New day and I guess it’s not a good sign when I feel like I have a hat on, but I don’t. I guess that’s my headache, but a hat sounds softer, more relaxed, purposeful even, right? Yes, I do like the idea of a hat better, no need to focus on this headache but where is it coming from? There was a ton of wind yesterday, so maybe allergies have blown in. Blown into my head. Let me check the pollen index -- I thought it was called a pollen count, but now I see the word index, and yes the pollen index is way up -- into the medium level, when before it was at the bottom: cedar/juniper, elm and mulberry. I’m trying to remember if those were some of the trees that showed up on my allergy tests a while back. In any case, I’m wearing this hat.

And actually, I was just thinking I would put an actual hat on, before going on a walk, this purple velvet hat that I found at St. Vincent De Paul -- I love when something is labeled there, and you ask how much it is, and the person working says a dollar. It was even on display right in the front, so I thought it would be more expensive, but anyway a dollar yes a dollar, but I wonder if, when I put this hat I’ll feel like I’m wearing two hats.

Not that I can go on a walk yet, actually, because I’m waiting for these lentils to cook. And they’re taking forever. I hope they don’t wreck my digestion -- my digestion is already wrecked, terrible bloating but at least not as bad as two days ago. Sometimes lentils wreck my digestion, even when it isn’t already wrecked, so I have to make sure that these lentils get super-soft, right? Maybe I’ll take a short walk while they’re still simmering.

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