Wednesday, May 09, 2012

As good as it can get

I thought Gay City would seem less like a clinic – with a library and a café on the ground floor, but I guess those things are separate because they have to buzz you into the clinic, which looks, well, like a clinic. No exterior light, small and crowded and depressing. The people working there are nice enough, until the guy doing my test tells me I'll have to go to Harborview instead because I have a rash on my hand, and that might be a symptom of an STI. Because at Harborview they can tell you your results right away, whereas at Gay City you have to wait two weeks. Listen, I say, I'm not going to Harborview, do you understand? That will take much more than two weeks, so I think it makes a lot more sense for you to test me now.

He goes to check with someone, comes back and now it's okay to test me. These places are ridiculous – why would they send someone away, who's trying to get tested, because they might have a symptom, any symptom? Something about their rules I'm sure, because they can't treat STIs just test for them, but anyway I'm glad I asserted myself because who knows when in hell I would get to Harborview I mean I try to avoid hospitals is much as possible, since they’re basically just places where you get sick, right? And anyway this rash is almost surely not STI-related – I mean it comes on because my hands get supersensitive and then when I touch something it hurts. But, I wanted to mention it just in case, right?

Anyway, then they do the HIV test and that's fine, negative I mean, but I wasn't worried about that – actually, I wasn't even intending to get an HIV test, since I haven't done anything that felt risky since my last one, but at Gay City they really seem to want you to get the HIV test, probably something to do with their funding and it's funny the way the clinician just keeps asking you questions like nothing is going on, but really he's waiting for the rapid test to come back, and then it does, but the thing I liked was that they let you do the throat swab and the anal swab too – I always skip the anal one, because I get all tense and scared when someone sticks something up my ass – I mean when it's not in the context of getting fucked, and sometimes when it's in the context of getting fucked, but anyway they let you do it on your own. And then I'm back outside on that sunny day, the second one or is it the third, over to a second park, two parks in one day, that's as good as it can get.

5 comments:

theszak said...

Typhoid Marvin
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Typhoid_Mary

Max said...

nonprofit shenanigans indeed --

mattilda bernstein sycamore said...

Theszak, let's stick with Mary, okay? And, thank you, Max :)

Love--
mattilda

theszak said...

Someone may have missed the point

          > let's stick with Mary, okay?

mattilda bernstein sycamore said...

Oh, Mary!

Love –
mattilda