Tuesday, October 15, 2013

How I'm doing

Today I just want to be home. Except, I don’t know where that is. Of course, this is a common feeling while traveling, or a common feeling for me, but that doesn’t make me less exhausted. When the ideas are flowing through my head I feel okay, sometimes, but then they stop, and I remember when I felt this way before the ideas started flowing, and maybe that was just a few minutes ago.

Sometimes someone will ask me a simple question like what are you doing with the rest of your time here? And I think oh, do I have to do something, please, nothing more. Or, someone will ask how I’m doing, and I think oh no, do I have to talk about it, really? Or: let’s catch up. No, I don’t want to catch up, really. I mean I want to hear about you, please talk about you, I don’t want to talk about me, that’s too tiring.
I know this is just what I’m feeling in the crash, and if I could just crash instead of trying to do more I would probably feel better, or at least less overwhelmed, but when the crash happens so much of the time it’s hard not to try to do more.

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